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February 7, 2017

You’re a joke!

As I’ve been feeling a bit blue recently I bought myself a couple of books. Don’t worry, they were in a sale, I’m not spending madly while in a fug. One of these was a joke book, as mentioned in my post about meditation, and this book contains jokes on every subject. Go on. Test me. Wanna joke about fish? Two goldfish in a tank. One says to the other “How do you drive this thing” Wanna a joke about vegetarians? Why is eating vegetables crueller than eating animals? At least animals have a chance to run away! Wanna joke about Christmas?…

January 27, 2017

Please try to relax…

Not been feeling great of late, so I thought I’d try a few things to relax and lift my mood. For example, I’ve exercised more. This is good as I feel fitter. If I don’t feel good mentally, then a stepping stone on the path to doing so might be feeling better physically. Fit people always look happy don’t they? Look at Mo Farah. He’s LOVING it. I also bought myself a joke book. It was on sale so it was a bargain. Again, good. I’ve also had my hair cut, changed my blend of coffee, bought new socks and pants (Well, you never…

January 18, 2017

Little things

Sometimes it’s the little things. January is a ballache of a month. After the ‘whizz bang how’s yer father of Christmas’ comes a cold, wet month where the sun tries to shine but sits dulled by a grey sheet of cloud which colours one’s mood, one’s outlook, one’s perspective and makes everyone look and feel defeated. Or maybe it’s just me. I’ve always had issues with January. In January I struggle more than other months, and have to concentrate on my mental health, concentrate on staying well, concentrate on getting through. Today, this week, this month. I’m just getting through. Only…

January 12, 2017

Do you wanna build a snowman?

Do you wanna build a snowman? Do you wanna play outside? Actually no. I don’t. Thank you. Britain is in the grip of an arctic front, and snow will be all over your boing, to quote Craig David. It’s gonna be everywhere, and if you read the Daily Express, it’s gonna be all over everywhere for the next forever. The Daily Express. The only thing to knock bashing foreigners, Brexit, or rumours about Princess Diana’s death from its front page is the forecast of Britain in freezing conditions, and a report on how heavy snow and blizzards will SMASH Britain.…

January 10, 2017

A Letter to My GP

Dear GP, I’d address this personally if I knew which GP this was going to. Is it the grumpy one who told me my latest medication would have every side effect you could imagine? Or the young one I have clothing older than? Or is it the one who checked my colon? And I don’t mean read my blog posts and reviewed my grammar. Actually I hope it’s him. He was the one that shoved his finger up my bum so I feel we have a connection. I think his name is John. Therefore. For my doctor John, I’m writing…

January 9, 2017

Pots and pans

I’ve been thinking about my gran a lot recently. More than normal perhaps. Weird how you can miss someone who’s been dead for almost 20 years. My gran told me this story when I was growing up and, although I’ve told it before, she’s been on my mind, so indulge me. Besides it’s a good story. My gran and grandfather were both Irish, and while neither were educated and booksmart, both were bright people. This story isn’t an ‘Irish’ joke before you get all ‘right on’ on me. This actually happened. And yes, they really were both called Molly…

January 5, 2017

Happy New Year!

Hello there, and happy new year to you and yours! It’s still close enough to January 1st to wish those you meet Happy New Year isn’t it? Of course it is. Anything else is just rudeness. Did you have a good one? Christmas that is. I trust you did, and I hope a jolly fat man came and emptied his sack in your living room. And I hope Santa visited you too. *Badoomtish* This really is just a quickie to let you know there are some changes afoot at ZMG HQ. Small ones. Not biggies. We’re just having a…

December 20, 2016

So this is Christmas…

How are we all? Fed up of the C word already, or planned and prepared with everything wrapped and ready to go, or are you just gonna leave Christmas until the weekend, and panic buy for your nearest and dearest from the local garage? I realised I’d become old when I started buying this year’s Christmas presents, last year. A Gap sale was gwan and ting and I saw some hoodies which won’t fit my children now, but will next year. My gran taught me well. If I carry on like this I’ll be buying them adult clothes in April just because…

December 15, 2016

Are you chopped liver? A redundant parent?

When you become a parent you become chopped liver, redundant, pointless. You no longer mean anything… …to your own parents. Let me explain. Or let me put something to you. If you’re lucky enough to have parents that are alive, and you have kids, ask your mum or dad this question: If me and the kids were in a burning building, and you could only rescue the kids or me, who would it be? In essence, in a nutshell, in brief, in outline, to sum up… I put it to you that their answer would be, “the children”. Regretfully, you’re…

December 11, 2016

What are your best blog posts of 2016?

2016. Wow. It’s been a tough year. But we’re not going to talk about that, are we? Instead we at ZmG HQ are concentrating on the good things, the brilliant things, the BEST things, and invite you (Yes, YOU!) to share your favourite blog posts of 2016. Wait till you see what we’ve got as an incentive, a carrot on a stick if you will, to lure you and entice you to join in. Well Zeit My Geist! Anyone heard of Alexa? Link up something you’ve written, something you’re proud of, something you’ve won an award for, something that,…

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